Would you leave your kids at home by themselves?

Would you leave your kids at home by themselves?

There was an article in Sunday's local paper reference children being left at home by themselves which gave me flashbacks to my previous job as a police officer.

Many times I responded to homes with unattended children inside, sometimes even outside the house.

Each circumstance was different, but too many times I did find children left home alone.  Sometimes, a cultural difference was very apparent (we found children locked in the closet, common to the region the parents were from).

While reading the article, it quoted a child specialist stated the approximate age appropriate for a child left alone was eight years old.

I am wondering if this child specialist is relying on the assumption that all eight-year-olds are the same and receive the same stimulation from their education and parents.

Regressing, I did find children of this age, unattended, and completely unable to take care of themselves and other children that may have been with them. I also found several children of this age, left alone, with complete knowledge of how to get a hold of their parents, with phone numbers, how to get ahold of the neighbors, who to contact in case of an emergency and where the food was in the house.

There were also times when I found children much older, again, not able to take care of themselves or their siblings.

My initial thoughts were of the children's welfare, and then the thoughts of the parents who left the children by themselves.

When the police find children unattended, they exhaust all avenues to locate the parents or relatives and check the house to make sure the residence is safe for children of that age to be left alone in that environment.

I have personally inspected homes (and have talked to other officers who have done the same) to find that some homes should not have children in them at all, whether the parents were home or not. Homes were in total disarray, with garbage piled up inside, as high as 4 feet, with a slight path in the middle of the garbage to access the other rooms.

We have found weapons, such as guns, knives, matches and other dangerous substances, such as chemicals (household cleaners) within children's reach. Some homes had virtually no food, and if they did, it was spoiled/rotten/moldy.  I’ve taken money from my own pocket to make sure the children got something decent to eat. (Sidenote; a fellow officer was transporting 3 young children to Child Haven for protective custody and stopped at a local fast food drive thru to get the children something to eat and had a complaint filed on her because the citizen couldn’t see the children in the car.  The citizen thought the officer was buying the food to feed her own children.)

I have also been inside homes where you could actually hear the roaches crawling around inside the cupboards and seeing mice or rats running along the baseboard.

I have personally wiped down children, due to the filth that had accumulated on them.

I have dealt with angry parents. Angry because someone would actually call the police because their child was at home alone. I have also dealt with the gracious parents, thanking me and the person who called, grateful that someone was paying attention.

I personally think that “specialists” who state that a certain age it is okay for children to be left at home should take a look at the parents.

Kids learn from their parents. If the parents don't teach them what they need to know to survive, the children will be unable to properly care for themselves.

Parents need to know what dangers are within the house that they plan to leave the children in. Kids will be kids. They are curious, and they want to explore.

Many of the rooms in the house may have been off limits to the children and if the parents aren't home, this gives them a great opportunity to "explore”.

While many of the items that the children can find while exploring could be dangerous, some of the items that they may find could be embarrassing to the parents.

While your bedroom may be a private place for you, during the child's "adventure”, they may find something that you will have great difficulty in trying to explain to them. I'm sure there will be a great schoolyard story for them and a funny story in the future for the parents.

If a police officer responds to a house that has an unattended child, and they make the determination that the child cannot care for him/herself, the child may be taken into protective custody and the parents or guardians could be charged with neglect/abuse.

You, as a parent, should feel very comfortable leaving your child alone. If there is any doubt, you should try to resolve it by covering all the bases. Does your child know how to get a hold of you at any time? If they can’t get a hold of you, is there somebody else they can call? Is your house childproof? Is there a chance they could fall down the stairs? Can the neighbors check on them every so often? Do they know how to prepare their food? Can they answer the phone or the door?

There are several options in making sure that your children are safe, either at home or at school. The school district does operate a “Safekey” operation that allows them to stay after school for short periods of time until someone can pick them up.

If you see a child unattended, or suspect them to be, you can call the police, and remain anonymous.

It would be hard dealing with your conscience if you knew something was wrong and did nothing about it.